Saturday, October 30, 2010

Midnight in the Garden of Crude and Feeble

Greetings gentle reader. Fear not, I shall use small words for thee – for our overlords and their mouthpieces have spoken…. And verily, we hath been pronounced as meager of intellect.

For you see, we, the ‘great unwashed masses’ must be daft.

We disagree with our Lord, Barack the Merciful and Most Wise.

We…..find fault in his governance…

And this, our overlords cannot abide.

How can they explain our displeasure with our Lord?

How can we not see that he does all of this for us?

Does he not wish to clothe us?

To feed us?

To provide us all with a place to live?

Does he not strive to make sure that the air we breathe is pure?

To protect the land from the evils of the Great Dragon, Capitalism – from despoiling mother Gaiya?

Can we not see that he strives to protect us from the untold harshness of failure – by removing the unreasonable and minuscule chance that we might succeed? To swaddle all of us in the luxury of mediocrity so than none may feel the harshness of nothingness?

Can we not understand that he wishes to remake us into the Glory that is Europe? The Glory of His image as a World Leader – not just the leader of our crude and savage land?

Our Lord and his minions be not pleased.

That we bristle under our compassionate yoke vexes them – and their voices grow bitter.

From the Court Jesters Maher and Behar…

The Pasty one elucidatesWe have Democrats for one reason – to drag the ignorant hillbilly-half of this country into the next century, which in their case is the 19th.” He goes on further to explain “(We) don’t understand the issues. (We) are too stupid. (We) are like a dog. (We) can understand inflection. (We) can understand fear. (We) can understand dominance. (We) don’t understand issues.

Maher’s anger is great, as is the diameter of the stick up his ass….

And then there is the portly, diminutive Jester – who in her rage in describing a citizen wishing to directly challenge the machinery of our Lord, proclaimed ““She’s Going To Hell, This Bitch!”

Our Lord’s proclaimers of the most high word – they too cannot fathom our ignorance. From her perkiness, Katie Couric – bristling in her golden chair at state run media, describing the ‘great unwashed’ to Nina Totenberg, throating from her perch at Nationally Politically Correct Radio that she is ‘very afraid’ of the rumblings of the ignorant peasant class. No, there will be no “Juan-ing” of Nina – our Lord will know clearly where she stands….

And then there are our Lord’s lieutenants… So vast is their befuddlement, so complete is their rage, that the veneer of sanity slips.

He-Who-Looks-Like-Herman-Munster, Vassal Kerry, laments the “period of know-nothingism’’ that plagues our fruited plains

The Skeletal Vassal Pelosi, in fevered ramblings even laments "we haven't really gotten the credit for what we have done."

Verily, even her congressional counterpart Vassal Harry rambles incoherently that his efforts saved the world!

This madness, it is our fault you see. Our ignorance, nay our arrogance fuels this rage. Our intellectual betters deserve our loyalty – they need our praise. Without our undying love, how are they to focus on our betterment? They can ill-afford to be distracted by our discontent.

We must accept our fate as voiceless drones – dependent upon the Golden Apparatus of Government for all of our needs.

We must accept our ignorance and the terrible merciful wisdom of our Lord, his Vassals and their truth-sayers. We are but sheep before them.

We must come to enjoy the taste of government cheese with a spread of soft-tyranny.


On Tuesday, we can rise up and tell the ruling class which orifice they can insert their agenda.

Me, I’ll take the latter.

Cheese gives me gas.

1 comment:

  1. Bravo! What a wonderful return of the SubStandard from hiatus. Oh wait....Am I supposed to be too dumb to use the word hiatus?